Do you know some “mean girls”? And no, I’m not talking about your high school years — I’m talking about right now. Are you a “mean girl”? Before you say “no” and move on, let’s take a deeper look from a Christian Life Coaching perspective.
Maybe it’s not a mean girl in the traditional sense, but mean in those moments when we feel snappy, overwhelmed, or even a little resentful. If you’re here, you might be feeling like you’re stuck in a cycle of anxiety or overwhelm, and on your worst days, feeling completely numb to everything.
You’re not alone, and I want to share how Christian life coaching can help you break free from that cycle, heal your heart, and step into the peace and joy God promises. Although I found a fabulous Biblical counselor–he used very similar techniques I now use in my Life Coaching practice, I wish I had found someone like me years ago.
The Root of the “Mean Girl” Behavior: Hurting People Hurt People
There’s something I’ve learned in my own life — “hurt people hurt people.” I can’t even begin to tell you how this phrase has shaped my approach to those times when I’ve been hurt by others, or when I’ve found myself reacting in ways I’m not proud of. When we’re in pain, emotionally or mentally, we often lash out. It’s easier to project that pain outward than to deal with it internally.
I see this often in the women I coach. Maybe you’ve been there, too. You wake up already feeling behind, overwhelmed by everything and everyone around you. You start the day with a negative thought or a bit of self-doubt, and before you know it, you’re snapping at your kids, your spouse, or even the poor cashier at the grocery store. Those little “mean girl” moments don’t just happen in high school. They can sneak into our adult lives, often rooted in emotional pain that we’ve never fully dealt with.
Let me tell you, this isn’t about blaming you — it’s about understanding you. The truth is, when we’re hurting, we often act out of that hurt without realizing how much damage it’s doing. That’s where Christian life coaching comes in.
A Real Life Example
Here’s a real-life example. Years ago our dog broke her leg. One day, as we were trying to get her out of the car for yet another vet visit, she snapped at me. I’ve got a bunch of kids and I cannot have a dog, a BIG, powerful dog around, who could possibly hurt one of us. Once we got her inside I told the vet what had happened. I also asked if maybe she needed to be put down because I could not risk her snapping at and possibly attacking one of the children.
He assured me she was not snapping at me, she was not a mean dog, she was just scared and in a lot of pain. I’m so glad he could see the situation clearly because I almost needlessly put our dog down. After some pain medication, she was almost back to herself and after another surgery to stabilize her leg, she was even better and eventually completely healed and recovered.
The point is, that she behaved badly, she acted mean because she was hurting. How many girls–and by girls, I also mean women–are hurting? How many are in so much pain all they can do is lash out? It can be a nasty look, a rudeness about them, or even just outright meanness.
How many of these women wake up every morning hating themselves and the life they live? They don’t start the day with positive affirmations…they start and end their days with self-hatred. They speak negative words about themselves, their lives, and those around them. Have you heard “A thing cannot give that it does not have?” These mean girls can not be nice to themselves…they are surely not going to be nice to you or me.
How Life Coaching Helps Heal Overwhelm and Anxiety
As a Christian life coach, I help women just like you find freedom from that cycle. I know how to help you because I’ve been you. It’s not about telling you to simply “get over it” or “think positive.” It’s about real transformation, starting from the mind and working its way into the heart.
Through thought awareness, we can identify the negative, self-sabotaging thoughts that keep us stuck. Research in neuroplasticity (the brain’s ability to change and grow) has shown that we can literally rewire our minds by changing the thoughts we think. Isn’t that incredible? The more we intentionally choose thoughts that align with Scripture, the more we can experience peace, joy, and healing.
One of the key passages I share with my clients is Romans 12:2: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” This is where the real transformation begins — in your mind. You see, when we learn to filter our thoughts through the lens of God’s Word, we begin to see ourselves and others in a new light.
And by filtering our thoughts through the lens of God’s Word, I don’t mean chapter and verse. I mean practicing simple thoughts like: “Everything is working out in my favor, God’s got me, God isn’t surprised, nothing has gone wrong, my life is happening for me, not to me.”
Scripture: The Key to Renewing Your Mind
When I say Scripture is the foundation for healing, I’m not just talking about memorizing verses (though that’s helpful too!). I mean using the Word of God to speak truth into the very lies we’ve been believing. So many of us wake up each day overwhelmed by thoughts of self-doubt or anxiety. “I’m not good enough.” “I’ll never get it all done.” “I’m failing.” These thoughts don’t align with God’s truth. He calls us His beloved, chosen, and capable of amazing things through His strength.
Take Matthew 11:28-30, for example. Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Isn’t that exactly what we need when we feel overwhelmed? Life coaching, especially when grounded in Scripture, helps you let go of those heavy burdens — the ones that aren’t even yours to carry — and instead take on God’s peace.
It’s Not About Being “Perfect” — It’s About Healing
You might be wondering, “Is this really for me? I’m too far gone, too overwhelmed, or just too tired to start something new.” I get it. But that’s why Christian life coaching is so powerful. It’s not about fixing everything overnight. It’s about starting where you are, with God’s grace to lead the way.
And let’s be real — sometimes we need help. There’s no shame in that. Even the saints needed guidance on their journey. St. Teresa of Avila once said, “Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you, all things are passing; God never changes. Patience obtains all things. Whoever has God lacks nothing; God alone suffices.” In other words, God is the true source of peace — and when we align ourselves with His truth, we begin to experience His peace in a real, tangible way.
Ready to Heal and Grow?
I know the journey can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to do it alone. As your Christian Life Coach, I can help you begin the process of healing, finding peace, and breaking free from the cycle of self-doubt and anxiety that so many women struggle with. Whether it’s through one-on-one coaching sessions or simply learning how to renew your thoughts with Scripture, we can work together to start transforming your life.
You are ready to step into the peace and joy God has for you, click below to sign up for a free consultation. Together, we’ll work through the pain, the hurt, and the overwhelm — and replace it with the love, grace, and transformation God promises.
Scripture References:
- Romans 12:2
- Matthew 11:28-30
For more posts about Christian Life Coaching:
Finding Joy: Christian Life Coaching for Overwhelmed Women
Christian Life Coaching: What is It?
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